Say What...?

Morning ladies and gents (Are there any gents on th eforum? Not sure)
I am starting off this Chat thread so we'd have a word on whatever pops up to mind, from weather reports to mad shopping sprees.. Feel free to talk about everything and anything.

Hope this one picks up

me starting this one!! I have too many things on my mind at the mo'.........

i'll resume a bit about me so you can understand my mood at the present.

(it is work related )

i work as recepcionist in a very big company, sure you all know it: Kraft Foods - in Spain is most known for Milka, Royal, Oreo, El Caserio....

well the problem is that im only there to sustitute a girl that has lumbago and i know it's gonna end someday. Before that i worked as administrative and for me it was very hard to find the perfect job, However thanks to this i gained a lot fo experience that is helping a lot now to search my new job..


Now im back to do some job intws as im looking for an stable job.And why do i give it so much importance? you may wonder... because the lastest 4 years ive been working in temporary jobs that will take me nowhere.I thought at the beginnig that tourism sector will do it for me but since i had a bad experience i've been away from it since then, trying to find my way in life. I want so much to be stable somewhere... so i dont have to think which one is gonna be the next, so i can rely on somehting and develop there.. but it is difficult.

Also, this is main for me cos I know while i dont get a stable job or the closest to it, I wont be able to travel to see the lads anywhere. So there are 3 reasons for me to find out this and why worries me so much:

1-the lads (travvelling to see them etc)
2- travelling around the world....(No lads related!)
3- my own personal life... like... studying again french? having kids some day in a few years....built my home....

and this week i had few intws. One of them seem to be a great company and good work. But then again, I didnt work so well the intw. I mean, i did, i was good... But i really doubt if i was ever good enough to what they are searching. Yesterday I had another one, and doubting again if the lady will include me as one of the candidates, this one was good too. And on monday i do have another one...which i hope to do better as it is a good one and they need a really high level of English

So im freaking out now. Cos I'd love to stay in Kraft as it is great to be there, peopple are great, job is not that bad.... but it is not stable, even if this girl never comes back ( as ive been told her contract ends on 25th january).


And i know as long as i dont get this back to normal, my life wont get back to normal.... and so my weigh... and so many more things!!!

Hi cookie.
Thanks for holding me up in this thread:) (sounds like those Friendshp Books we used to write at when forwarding one to another, sentences like "back to back with me?" or "would you be the next thold me up?" )

Anyway, i am really glad you decided to write down and share with us the things you go through these days. Since we didn't have a decent chat on MSN or Gtalk about this before, it gave me a chance to see the wider picture now, and i really appreciate your effort on writing it down.

Like you, i am a person who NEEDS to have stability in his/ her life. it's more a matter of charecter, rather than those circumstances you wrote. I mean, in addition to the circumstances, it also has a connection to how well you cope with instability, and me personally, I hate it!!!

What does your current company tell you about what is planned for you after 25th Jan.? The worst thing possible is NOT KNOWING!! Many employers hold their employees under this feeling, sometimes not even realizing how stressful it might be to the person, or even intentionally- and in this case it's plain cruelty!

If i were you, i would be very stressful as well so i think that your reaction is only natural.

On the onther hand, i think you need to be more "laid back" about it, i mean to take things more easy.. it's easy to say rather than do, i know, i know! But as soon as you try to lower your expectations towards an interview, the less you get hurt if you don't get the job for whatever reason!!
And from what you are writing about the how well/not well you did at the last 2 interiews, i come to a conclusion that you don't believe in yourself enough! Or you did believe in the past but started doubting your professional level due to lack of pure luck at the interviews you'd been at so far.
I think that the key word here is believing more in yourself!

In my short time of working at my current job possition, i had to do 2 itnerviewing sessions for temporary secretaries for our department, and i've been advised by the personnel office that while itnerviewing and talking to the person- above any professional qualities, i should pay attention to the body language of the person interviewed, also to see how well she explains herself, how costructive her answers are, and - how confidnet she is in herself. The last one is the most imporant one, and if a person is not confident in him/herself, it is shown straight away, and it gives some sort of feeling that this person may not execute his/ her tasks in a confident i.e. professional way when he/ she get hired for the job!!!
Gin, i am sure you gave a moment of thought about this subject but if you haven't, i think it's one of the main reasons here.. apart from luck, which is always necessary to a certain amount, at ANY interview.

i hope i could contribute somehow to your itnerview tomorrow!!!
I wish you all the luck and keep fingers crossed, dear! Please update how was it, ok?

I remember what that was like couple of years ago for me when I first finished school. Going through one interview after another.
I remember the last one I did, I just didn't care that day. I had my mind on other things, like my bf breaking up with me at the time. I guess that kind of helped me get through that interview, thinking of other things actually, rather than thinking I should do good on this interview.
I passed it anyway and just started my 6th year for the company now.
And idd, we were always trained in our education we should look confident about ourselves, so what Jenny says from experience is idd true.
Keep us updated, we'll keep our fingers crossed for ya!!

Well hunnys, thanks for your replies...

I made my intw on monday. Not bad. But they didnt choose. Not that I care much as I say.Wasnt feeling nervous and not gave too much of bad answers I guess. But Im not giving a second thought actually.

About my other intw, I made last week, in a company called Revistronics... I was nervous, but also very comfortable. I do think however i wont ge it because they might want someone with countings knowledge and ... i dont...

On the other hand. the girl stills without coming. I know that she wants to come back.... but I dont know If she'll ever make it or when that will happen... I feel just soooooo good in that company! Everything is perfect. I had my bad days of course, it is not my ideal job... but who cares really when the rest is just.. perfect ! I just know that the day I leave that company I'm gonna be sooo sad!

And jen, i did thingk about my selfconfidence. I know that's my prob mainly. But....i just cant help it... after all i've been through , it is not so easy. I've tried to do believe me, I tried.... but it is over there... in my subconscious....

But, while I stay there Im just soo good. I just want a normal contract.... not one of sustitution............

As I say in my msn... Breathe deep, who knows how long it'll last.

I wish this was my only prob in my mind......... there's one more, deep one... that im trying to deal with for over year now..........

Admin wrote:

I wish this was my only prob in my mind......... there's one more, deep one... that im trying to deal with for over year now..........

What is it, baby?

Admin wrote:that im trying to deal with for over year now..........

Over a year?? Oh, wow!! Dealing with a problem for so long is hard!!

And jen, i did thingk about my selfconfidence. I know that's my prob mainly. But....i just cant help it... after all i've been through , it is not so easy. I've tried to do believe me, I tried.... but it is over there... in my subconscious....

self-confidence is not easy I know...but my experience is the more self assured u present urself the better( that doesn't mean u have to be inside).This is not easy for me as well though so I totally understand u :=(
[/i]
But, while I stay there Im just soo good. I just want a normal contract.... not one of sustitution............

I can believe the bad thing is that you don't know how it is going on...at the uni they try to do these contracts as well for one year or two and then u always have to worry if they renew them or not :=(

I wish this was my only prob in my mind......... there's one more, deep one... that im trying to deal with for over year now.......... [/quote]

hunnnneee we are always there for you and you do know that!!!

The Princess wrote:

Admin wrote:that im trying to deal with for over year now..........

Over a year?? Oh, wow!! Dealing with a problem for so long is hard!!

and you thought life is 'tough'?

Sir Barlows Cuddly Toy wrote:

The Princess wrote:

Admin wrote:that im trying to deal with for over year now..........

Over a year?? Oh, wow!! Dealing with a problem for so long is hard!!

and you thought life is 'tough'?

unf. it is not always :=(

Sir Barlows Cuddly Toy wrote:

The Princess wrote:

Admin wrote:that im trying to deal with for over year now..........

Over a year?? Oh, wow!! Dealing with a problem for so long is hard!!

and you thought life is 'tough'?

I've spent years dealing with severe problems myself, so I know how hard it is.
I also know how it is to feel like it is never gonna end,
when you just cannot see any light on the other side of the tunnel.
Even though I have survived my problems and left the worst ones behind me,
I still remember how it is to experience it - so yeah, I think life is tough! A real bitch sometimes.

The Princess wrote:

Sir Barlows Cuddly Toy wrote:

The Princess wrote:

Admin wrote:that im trying to deal with for over year now..........

Over a year?? Oh, wow!! Dealing with a problem for so long is hard!!

and you thought life is 'tough'?

I've spent years dealing with severe problems myself, so I know how hard it is.
I also know how it is to feel like it is never gonna end,
when you just cannot see any light on the other side of the tunnel.
Even though I have survived my problems and left the worst ones behind me,
I still remember how it is to experience it - so yeah, I think life is tough! A real bitch sometimes.

Hello! You didn't read my sentence right? Or i'm not reading your reply correctly.
In any case, i second each and every word!

Ginny, please read Rita's comment, and if you feel like sharing- we'd be more than happy to listen and hug and embrace, if we can't help at all. We lova ya!)

Sir Barlows Cuddly Toy wrote:Hello! You didn't read my sentence right? Or i'm not reading your reply correctly.
In any case, i second each and every word!

I believe we are agreeing that it's not easy all the time. + I was saying a little more about it

The Princess wrote:

Sir Barlows Cuddly Toy wrote:Hello! You didn't read my sentence right? Or i'm not reading your reply correctly.
In any case, i second each and every word!

I believe we are agreeing that it's not easy all the time. + I was saying a little more about it

The Princess wrote:

Sir Barlows Cuddly Toy wrote:

The Princess wrote:

Admin wrote:that im trying to deal with for over year now..........

Over a year?? Oh, wow!! Dealing with a problem for so long is hard!!

and you thought life is 'tough'?

I've spent years dealing with severe problems myself, so I know how hard it is.
I also know how it is to feel like it is never gonna end,
when you just cannot see any light on the other side of the tunnel.
Even though I have survived my problems and left the worst ones behind me,
I still remember how it is to experience it - so yeah, I think life is tough! A real bitch sometimes.

its hard to find the light when you dont even believe in yourself, dont trust in what i used to do...

it' s all very confusing..

by Sir Barlows Cuddly Toy on Tue 27 Jan 2009 - 14:13


Ginny, please read Rita's comment, and if you feel like sharing- we'd be more than happy to listen and hug and embrace, if we can't help at all. We lova ya!)

well, its hard to explain and there are many things mixed

on one hand.... ive been fooled ( by ex-friend)... twice recently (2 times in 2 years)... too much for me .

on the other hand, i got fired last summer ... in a bad way... that didnt help to myself confidence... and if you put that together with that everyone is looking at me like the weird/stupid/shy (those are synonims actually for many).... well, maybe, not everyone ... but... got couple of glances today at work that didnt like at all.

The only good thing im getting these days a lovely complimment " you've got beautiful eyes". And that does not coming of someone that will help to feel me not used/not of the company ... Long story.

and.. i also have few probs... with the Take That fans World (Spanish one!) ... and sometimes the lads are involved!

Admin wrote:
well, its hard to explain and there are many things mixed

on one hand.... ive been fooled ( by ex-friend)... twice recently (2 times in 2 years)... too much for me .

on the other hand, i got fired last summer ... in a bad way... that didnt help to myself confidence... and if you put that together with that everyone is looking at me like the weird/stupid/shy (those are synonims actually for many).... well, maybe, not everyone ... but... got couple of glances today at work that didnt like at all.

The only good thing im getting these days a lovely complimment " you've got beautiful eyes". And that does not coming of someone that will help to feel me not used/not of the company ... Long story.

and.. i also have few probs... with the Take That fans World (Spanish one!) ... and sometimes the lads are involved!

I can honestly say that i don't think your'e any of th ethings you mentioned above! I see you as a beautiful girl, with gorgeous eyes indeed, who is smart, and sensitive, and lovely in her heart! All the rest, you can feel sorry for them coz they'evgot issues with you, and not vise versa- so they are the ones who need to get a life!!!
What a friend betrays you, i think there isn't much worth than that! i hope that with time you won't feel as hurt as you are now. it's such a pain that you had to go through the same betrail twice. disgusting!

i hope that our posts one to another do only good to us i feel like that, anyway.

Sir Barlows Cuddly Toy wrote:

Admin wrote:
well, its hard to explain and there are many things mixed

on one hand.... ive been fooled ( by ex-friend)... twice recently (2 times in 2 years)... too much for me .

on the other hand, i got fired last summer ... in a bad way... that didnt help to myself confidence... and if you put that together with that everyone is looking at me like the weird/stupid/shy (those are synonims actually for many).... well, maybe, not everyone ... but... got couple of glances today at work that didnt like at all.

The only good thing im getting these days a lovely complimment " you've got beautiful eyes". And that does not coming of someone that will help to feel me not used/not of the company ... Long story.

and.. i also have few probs... with the Take That fans World (Spanish one!) ... and sometimes the lads are involved!

I can honestly say that i don't think your'e any of th ethings you mentioned above! I see you as a beautiful girl, with gorgeous eyes indeed, who is smart, and sensitive, and lovely in her heart! All the rest, you can feel sorry for them coz they'evgot issues with you, and not vise versa- so they are the ones who need to get a life!!!
What a friend betrays you, i think there isn't much worth than that! i hope that with time you won't feel as hurt as you are now. it's such a pain that you had to go through the same betrail twice. disgusting!

i hope that our posts one to another do only good to us i feel like that, anyway.

yeah not everyone is fooling others...I am always trying to make it right for everyone which is not easy believe me,and if u have been fooled then of course it is really difficult to believe again ( very own experience)but the world is as good as we make it and if we take care we can make our little fan world here for everyone a nice place to be :=)

Yeah, when you loose trust in people you once thought was loyal, it is so hard to trust new friends! I get so suspicious!!

it is hard, but in the end, all worth it coz you come out feeling 'stronger'. I've been in same situation 6 years ago where all of my friends but one dropped me like a brick. I still find it hard to trust ppl nowadays but it gets better when you know you can talk to them about anything. I sometimes have a trust issue with my bestests pall (the one that didn't drop me). I guess when you have been in a situation like that you'll never fully get your trust back. But you learn to live with it in a way.
ABout the looks, I must admit i get the same sensation sometimes. You should as Gary says it 'hold your head high, arms open wide' It's not easy at times, I know. And you deffo do not look weird/stupid or shy to me, if that's any consolation at all
And remember, when you're way down, all you can do is go up!!

Stien wrote:it is hard, but in the end, all worth it coz you come out feeling 'stronger'. I've been in same situation 6 years ago where all of my friends but one dropped me like a brick. I still find it hard to trust ppl nowadays but it gets better when you know you can talk to them about anything. I sometimes have a trust issue with my bestests pall (the one that didn't drop me). I guess when you have been in a situation like that you'll never fully get your trust back. But you learn to live with it in a way.
ABout the looks, I must admit i get the same sensation sometimes. You should as Gary says it 'hold your head high, arms open wide' It's not easy at times, I know. And you deffo do not look weird/stupid or shy to me, if that's any consolation at all
And remember, when you're way down, all you can do is go up!!

Indeed!! I so agree!

Thank you all so much for you messages, and yes It helpet a lot to get throug this dark days I went through . All I know, I somehow feel the same sometimes but is another week, another day, another month....

Now I just feel...a bit nostalgic.... This morning I played a spanish singer(Sergio Dalma) on my mp4, and when certain song came.... One face, one name, one smile, one moment came back.... All the things i would love to say to someone came to my mind.....

The title sing is "Perfect Silence" (original title: "Silencio Perfecto") ... and guess which guy comes to my mind?.....





Only someone that knows the whole story can truly understand... or may understand why im going through.....

All i do.. is breathe deep and keeping on....


EDIT: the link to the song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m2EosP5_Rk4

translation of the song:(more or less!)

Si te vas de esta manera
If you leave me this way
Duele tanto el corazón
Hurts so deep in my heart
Y me muero en esta espera
I die waiting here

Si te vas If you leave me
Si te vas If you leave me
Si te vas If you leave

Nuestra historia compartida
The story we shared
Fue sin duda lo mejor
was the best one
Lo demás es fantasía
The rest is just fantasy

Si te vas If you leave me
Si te vas if you leave me
Si te vas if you leave me

Silencio perfecto Perfect silence
Nada más nothing more
Recuerdos que llenan cada hueco Memories filling each empty space


Porque aún te siento mía... because one day i feel you are mine

Hoy mismo pararé el tiempo Today time will stop
Cada momento each moment
Mis latidos y mis gestos my heartbeats and my hands
Y aunque sé que no te tengo and even i dont have you
Lo siento, pero te invento Im sorry But I invent you
La ciudad es un desierto The city is a desert
Donde busco pedacitos de ayer where i search each piece of our yesterday
Nuestro ayer.... Our yesterday

Un amante a la deriva A lover that goes floating downstream
Sólo en esta habitación lonely in this room
Dime qué hago con mis días tell me what should i do with my days

Si te vas if you leave me
Si te vas if you leave me
Si te vas if you leave me

Silencio perfecto Perfect silence
Nada más nothing more
Las noches vacías de tu cuerpo Empty nights of your body
Pero aún te siento mía but I still feel you are mine

Hoy mismo pararé el tiempo Today time will stop
Cada momento Each moment
Mis latidos y mis gestos my heartbeats and hands
Y aunque sé que no te tengo and even i know i dont have you
Lo siento, pero te invento Im sorry but i invent you
La ciudad es un desierto The city is a desert
Donde busco pedacitos de ayer where i search peaces of yesterday

Y me muero en la ausencia de tu boca And I die when your lips are missing
¿Cómo puedo yo vivir si no me tocas? How can I live without your touch?

Silencio perfecto Perfect silence
Nada más nothing more
Recuerdos que llenan cada hueco memories that fill each empty space
Porque aún te siento mía... because i still feel you are mine

this is the pic of the moment, of the day, when all my dreams came true.......

16th july 2005.Madrid.



(im the girl on the right).

*sighs*

...becomes suddenly sad,happy and special at the same time...... nostalgic, that is.

Admin wrote:this is the pic of the moment, of the day, when all my dreams came true.......

16th july 2005.Madrid.



(im the girl on the right).

*sighs*

...becomes suddenly sad,happy and special at the same time...... nostalgic, that is.

veeery nice pic Ginny do love it :=)

British_flower wrote:

Admin wrote:this is the pic of the moment, of the day, when all my dreams came true.......

16th july 2005.Madrid.



(im the girl on the right).

*sighs*

...becomes suddenly sad,happy and special at the same time...... nostalgic, that is.

veeery nice pic Ginny do love it :=)

the day was even more better than the shown up above..........

I miss Mark.... You know what i mean, dont ya sil??